Stuart The Barbarian

The Greatest Story (Nearly) Never Told!

On the corner of Templeton Lane and Maypole Way, in the village of Little Whimpering on the Coot, squatted the offices of Winkle & Rabid, Chartered Accountants. An old, dusty building, containing a rat’s nest of old, dusty corridors, all stuffed with old, dusty boxes of files.

Stuart’s first adventure, A Sword For All Reasons, will plot the rise of our intrepid hero on his first adventure to free the land from the Evil Sourceror of Yum. Who is interestingly called Cecil. With his trusty sidekick and ironer in chief, Buttons, at his side, follow Stuart as he changes from an accountant…

… to an accountant with a sword! What could possibly go wrong?

An early excerpt from A Sword For All Reasons:

Kicking open the door, Stuart charged into the tomb with a mighty roar, tripping over a slightly raised stone and dropping his sword in mid-charge.

Still screaming he looked around, the scream tailing off as he found himself inconveniently alone in an empty, avocado coloured restroom. A restroom suspiciously devoid of ten headed lemmings, but conveniently containing five toilet stalls. Perfect for the man on the go, who needed to go.

Time for a refreshment break. After all, reasoned Stuart, it had been ages since breakfast, so maybe it was a sign from the gods or something.

Picking up his sword, Stuart leaned it up against the wall, then hitched up his loin cloth to reveal bright white and sensible underwear before heading towards the nearest stall. His face alight with the look of a man hoping the future might contain the surprise treasure of pleasantly soft, multi-ply toilet paper. After several days of nothing but leaves, the thought of such luxury sounded even better than vanquishing a deformed rodent…

Stuart’s adventures are coming soon… whether Buttons is ready or not!